July 16, 2004
Martha's Big House
Soon to be making fashionable holiday doilys for cell block H...
Martha Stewart will be relocating to a federal holiday college for five months followed by five months of enforced domestic servitude in a sentence handed down in connection to her trial conviction.
Her post-sentence remarks were a real gem. In a remarkably revealing display of vanglorious hubris, she remarked how during this "small personal matter'" - lying to federal investigators - she was "all the while more concerned about the well being of others than for myself". What a hero!
Martha goes on to plug her web site, name drop her company, hawk subscriptions to her magazine, and plea to advertisers. The only thing missing was her 800 number, with operators standing by...
Martha has zero reticence about what she has done wrong, indeed an utter failure to even acknowledge it. To Martha, telling the truth to the government is a personal choice - echoes of an impeachment gone by. Those who argue that her conviction violates the notion of self-incrimination are ignorant of law - there is a difference between refusing to incriminate yourself - pleading the fifth - and making deliberate mistatements to cover up your involvement in wrongdoing. Martha thinks she's entitled to her falsehoods.
Well, when they do her body-cavity search on prison check-in, maybe they can search for where Martha hid her conscience...
Posted by MEC2 at July 16, 2004 04:32 PM